lessons from 5 years ago

The year was 2003. I was 20 years old. My parents were in the process of getting a divorce, my relationship was on the rocks, and I was a month away from dropping out of college. My then-fiance (we are no longer together) was going through some pretty tough times herself and I made a decision: either I could stay in school where I wasn't happy, or go back home and try and patch up my life, notably the relationship that I had sabotaged through letting the stress get to me. I chose to give up college and move back home. Although most people might think that it was an understandable move, our relationship ended less than a year later.

Something else that occurs to me each time I think about those days: if I had just stayed focused on school, I would have completed my degree, and a masters by now. I can't say that it's a wasted decision though- because I learned many important lessons from the decisions I made 5 years ago. In choosing to give up what I had fought for years to accomplish, I learned that:

*Your problems in life do not give you the right to treat people badly.

*Mentally blocking yourself by focusing on the negative only serves to delay action towards the positive.

*Choosing to do something out of love instead of your own best financial interests is just that - a choice. Don't ruin your selfless decision by getting depressed about it.

* Your mood affects those around you. Sometimes the only thing your loved ones want is to see you happy.

* We are all only 1 step away from disaster. Plan for it and you'll be two or three steps away.

Recently I quit my job (again, I was unhappy), and we are moving back to Portland- a city I really don't like because of it's horrible job market and bad traffic. My wife wants to move there so that she can be close to her parents while she has the baby. Initially I agreed but over the last few weeks I've been complaining loudly about how much I hate it there and how horrible of a time I was having finding decent work that would support us. She couldn't take it anymore and finally told me exactly how my mood affects those around me.

I realized that the lessons from 2003 were being ignored when they were needed most. My life was changing and I was missing everything that defined security in the modern era: shelter, money for food, money to pay the bills, saving for the future.

Now that I know what is happening, I can spot the sabatour behavior within myself.

Product review: Nickel and Dimed

I haven't read this book yet, but this post from Get Rich Slowly (one of my favorite blogs) directly affects my own mission: to start from where I am now, financially speaking, in a new city, and build wealth, stability, and security in a reasonable amount of time, all while balancing a life. I think I'll pop on over to Adam Shepherd's site and download his book for free.

I'll let you all know what I think of it when I get through.

*note: I am also planning on spending the 12.95 + S/H to actually *read* the book, pending a quick library search first ;-) so Adam, don't feel too bad!

A turning point

This is the first post on a new project of mine. I'm out of work, broke, depressed, moving to a place with one of the highest unemployment rates in the country and I have a baby on the way. This blog is my inspiration to take back my own life through understanding financial management, personal finances, and work-life balance.

Here goes!

The name for this blog was chosen because pennies and pounds represent the same thing: waste on a small level, financially, ecologically, or materially will hurt the whole as much as waste on a larger level. On the flip-side, attention to detail and frugal living as a movement will change the scape of our world just as much as if corporate waste was eliminated. Each purchase- or lack thereof- is a vote cast in the marketplace. Our consumer-driven society must return to its roots with sustainable living, and a balanced lifestyle.

Let's get living!